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My Name is Winky


Patrick Park

Today is February 29, 2021. My name is Winky. It is currently the coldest it has ever been. A cold, dark world. Is this all there is to life? A false hope that we may someday escape from this clutching prison. Is that all we can look towards? It feels like a repeating cycle. We grow up together for a while and then one day, some of us stay while others depart. But why me? Why couldn’t I join my friends in the beautiful paradise that is the afterlife? It feels so lonesome, like a rainbow in a storm. I am not beautiful, I am merely a minuscule object that is lost in the vast, unforgiving universe. My bright colors cannot fight off the harsh weather, nor can it ward off the mythological beings whose single footstep can destroy a colony. What is my purpose? A million years can pass and not a single being will notice my presence. We all desire to leave our mark on this world. What is the purpose? A temporary span of experiences known as life is something we consider priceless, but why? An existential question that has been asked throughout history. What is my purpose? Providing something for others until I join my fallen comrades. Why? Why can I not frolic and laugh like those titans? Why can I not run like those animals with four legs? I am stuck with no movement. I am stuck with no purpose. I am stuck with no family. I am stuck finding meaning in my own life. The titans refer to me as a “flower of death”, using me as a crown when mourning the deceased. A fitting name, truly. I suppose I should feel flattered as our family was chosen as a means to honor a titan’s death. They act as though death is something to honor. An interesting concept to say the least. When we die, we (as flowers) are often used as compost in order to help the future generation. But if there’s anything I learned, it’s to live in the moment. Just a few months ago, I had all of my friends near me. We chatted, laughed, and even asked each other questions about life. We were quite the philosophical bunch. However, we had an older gentleman, a fern plant to be exact, that always told us to enjoy the time while it lasted. We often ridiculed him. We believed those times would last forever. Even when each of our companions disappeared one by one, we laughed it off saying that they would be back. We were delusional really, refusing to see our own reality. Perhaps the day will arrive where we may see each other once more. I have not been feeling my best throughout these days, I fear my time to join the afterlife is coming.

Today is March 1st, 2021. Something strange happened yesterday. The weather is suspiciously getting warmer. Usually, it feels like an igloo forming inside my petals during the nights however, yesterday’s night was somewhat bearable. Also, I see a tiny seedling about 2 feet on the right. I know it’s nothing and may not survive, but I still feel excited. I lost all my friends, one by one. The fact that I might have a new friend in the near future makes me happy. Would John be a good name? Perhaps I will name him Winky Jr. Although my time is coming soon, I will do everything in my power to grow this seedling. It feels silly to say this out loud but I already feel a bond with this poppy seedling. I will teach it the different things I have learned in this lifetime. Teaching them about the titans, teaching them about the different seasons, and teaching them the different plants. I feel this is the purpose of our lives, plant or titan. Of course, you should expend some of your energy, but you should expend some of your energy to help grow the future generation. I will keep you updated on the progression of this seedling.

Today is March 2nd, 2021. I have an update for you. The seedling is almost old enough to begin communicating with me. I’m so excited, I can feel my roots jumping up and down. I also feel nervous about talking with this seedling because I haven’t talked to anyone in person in such a long time. It is also my first time physically communicating with a poppy plant. Poppy plants have a reputation in the plant community as they are one of the most beloved flowers in the state of California. Being able to meet a poppy in person is an incredible honor. I will keep you updated tomorrow when we are able to communicate.

Today is March 3rd, 2021. Another major update has surfaced, I have finally exchanged words with the young Poppy. It woke up, scared and confused. I had to talk to it, telling it where we were and what it was. The young Poppy asked for my name, to which I replied “Winky Jr.”. It asked what I was and replied, “A Periwinkle flower”. The Poppy looked confused and went silent for a minute. I decided to start up the conversation once more with, “You are a Poppy flower, a flower that is beloved by the Titans”. The Poppy asked what a titan was. I claimed it was a name we gave to the humans as their footsteps often shook the ground. Of course, this was a silly mistake as it asked what a human was. After spending the whole day passing on my knowledge to the young poppy, I began to give the poppy his own personal traits. The Poppy asked what a good name was. I asked, “How does Summer sound?” The Poppy agreed to this name and our friendship began. After this, Summer thanked me and I welcomed him. Although Summer was the one thanking me, in my heart, I felt I needed to thank Summer. She became the one shining light after several months of darkness. I realized I didn’t need to run and shout like the humans, I just needed someone like me. Someone who could relate to my struggles, someone who was literally in my feet. My will to live became stronger than ever. I hope to see you again tomorrow journal. Although it’s a shame I will not live long enough to see Summer grow, I’m glad I could meet them.

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